'He died a superman': ordinary South Africans rally around widow and children of slain whistleblower Marius 'Vlam' van der Merwe

South Africans have rallied together to comfort the Van der Merwe family of slain Madlanga Commission witness Marius "Vlam" Van der Merwe, who was known as Witness D. 

The forty-one-year-old former Ekurhuleni Metro Police Department (EMPD) officer was shot dead in full view of his family in Brakpan on Friday, December 5, shortly after 8pm.

Police said the attackers were travelling in a white Nissan NP200 bakkie and confirmed that an AK-47 automatic rifle was used. A manhunt is underway.

In the wake of this tragedy, Leanne has turned to social media, sharing her grief through a series of heartfelt TikTok videos that have resonated deeply with South Africans. 

"I cling to our memories, it's all I can do now 😭💔. I don't know how I'm going to get through this, babe. How am I going to live knowing I'll never hear you say you love me, never get another hug, never get a kakout for not letting you know I'm at work safe 😭😭😭

"It's just so unfair 😭😭😭😭 I love you forever 💔😭," she expressed in her latest TikTok.

Her videos have not only offered a glimpse into her sorrow but have also sparked an outpouring of sympathy and support from a country grieving alongside her.

Comments on her posts showed the nation's collective heartbreak.

"The entire South Africa is crying with you, Leanne 💔💔. Sorry for what has happened ❤️❤️❤️."

Another netizen added: "Sis, you’re not alone. Your husband's courage shook this nation, and his light didn’t die- it lives in all of us. May you feel strength in every breath, and may this country hold you the way he would’ve. We honour him. We hold you.. 🕯."

@nom_motha commented: "He died a Superman 🙌🏾."

@Yusrah Meyer: "I’m so sorry for your loss  may god bring you,ur children and all your family peace and comfort during this very hard time. Everyone is praying for you and as a wife and mother myself I mourn with you I’m so very sorry ." 

@tazzy commented: "As a South African hearing of your husband's murder, was heartbreaking. Our justice system is a failure. I'm just so heartbroken for you and the kids."

@Hlubie09  shared: "You are not alone my sister, there are a lot of people grieving with you. This hurts really bad." 

@TM commented: "Not me chopping onions every time I see these posts, South Africans let's stand up and fight this, let us put our differences aside, we will deal with them later, it cannot be business as usual. Black and white, coloured, Indians, we cannot be waiting for Mkhwanazi to do everything."

In another poignant TikTok video, she said: "I love you forever, my babe 💔😭. I don't know how it (will) be without you 💔😭Something in the Heavens tells me that we'll be together again 😭😭 Ek so so lief vir jou 😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔." 

In the third video, Leaane shared snippets of the Vlam with his children. The caption read: "How do I say goodbye? How do I carry on, never seeing you again? 😭😭😭😭😭😭 I love you forever, babe, always!!"

This modern form of mourning, referred to as "digital mourning", is increasingly common.

Nirmala Bijraj, a licensed mental health counsellor who studies this phenomenon, notes that many people now seek comfort online, especially after the Covid-19 pandemic made in-person connections more difficult.

She explains that the digital world offers a platform for people to share their grief and connect with others experiencing similar losses.

"People used to connect with others through phone calls or in-person visits, but now more people, especially younger generations, are finding their support systems online," shares Bijraj.

Jeremy Bergen, another grief counsellor, adds: "Younger people, in particular, feel safer being more and more transparent online because there’s a certain inevitability that all of our lives are now online in some capacity."

This openness can reduce the stigma associated with grief, making it easier for people to find support.

The American Counseling Association says: "It can decrease the taboo on grief and death and allow people to discuss and share their grief with others more freely.

"Digital grieving can also increase people’s sense of community and support; people can use the internet and social media to find and connect with others who are experiencing loss and discover grief-related resources."

Van der Merwe's death is a stark reminder of the dangers faced by whistleblowers in South Africa.

His name is now part of a grim list alongside other slain figures like Babita Deokaran and Mpho Mafole, both of whom were killed after bravely exposing corruption.