ConCourt Ruling Sparks National Debate: When Lobola Means You’re Already Married

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A ConCourt ruling against signing ante nuptial contracts after customary marriage has started a conversation on the importance of lobola (dowry) and its significance:

@Askash I only learned this because Black Coffee got divorced. The more people I spoke to about it, the more I realised how few people know about it. If lobola has been paid, your property might already be co-owned. So I spoke to Cor van Deventer, a conveyancer at VDM Attorneys, to unpack what most South Africans are getting wrong. Traditional marriages are legally recognised under the Recognition of Customary Marriages Act of 1999. Once lobola is paid, you are legally married. If no antenuptial contract was signed before lobola was paid, this means that if you jointly own a house and get divorced, you guys remain halvies on the house.

@mongeasy Interesting. Is this applicable even if no celebration took part, I recall this to be an important consideration, yes?

@DebSeb1994 Yeah I remember that discussion with the HHP’s wife case. The family disputes that the bride was never brought home to the in-laws and there were no celebrations but the judge said that was not necessary and the lobola negotiations were enough to conclude the marriage.

@Solphendukaa Let’s normalise asking our partners if any lobola deposit had been paid for them before and that relationship eventually ended. Ngoba, y’all end marrying people who are technically already married.

@SteveVulture Good advice. Thank you Thandubuntu. I asked my girlfriend now and she said her then bf sent his family to kokota at her home. The guy didn’t pay, but vulamlomo and whisky was given. The bride price was provided and the guys family said they will come back. Now she is with me.

@Katli_molelekwa This is so true. I always say we need to be honest about everything even the finances and I’m not gendered about it. My partners know how much I’m earning. My expenses and everything. I don’t know if this makes me to be a simp or not. The point here is honesty and transparency.

@MasonDoLindor What is the divorce process/procedure for one who is traditionally married? Married via Amalobolo?

@Refiloe_Mshengu A lotta people just keep moving on paying lobola with everyone they meet without divorcing the previous partner!

@ntukz7 Just spoke to a lawyer and she said Lobola alone doesn’t mean that there’s customary marriage, the judgement is only saying, if you lobola, do celebration and then Vat n Sat, you are seen as then married. Any prenup signed after is null and void.

@tumisole Pre-Nup before lobola negotiations! The end.

@MaVezi_ Customary marriage is a process which starts at ‘Lobola’. By paying lobola, the assumption is marriage because that’s where it begins. The problem started when black thought a white wedding wa the only symbol of marriage.

@ZeeRight Why don’t you guys want lobola to be recognised as marriage? Why would you even go through the process of lobola with someone if your intention was not to get married?

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