A look back at Chelsea's famous 6-0 demolition of Arsenal in 2014 — a bittersweet memory for Blues fans as the Gunners celebrate their latest Premier League triumph.
Image: AFP
March 22, 2014 stands as one of the great days of my sports viewing career.
Ah, I remember it fondly. There we were, three of us — myself and my mates Jonathan and Stu. We had made our way to Parkhurst, to the familiar surrounds of the legendary Jolly Roger to watch that Saturday’s English Premier League encounter.
We apparently expected a high-scoring affair, for a wager was made: for every goal scored, the opposition’s supporter was to knock back a shot of Jägermeister. It would seem that 12 years ago, we still had collective faith in our livers to wash clean the system and easily tackle any babalas that would follow.
Yes, the flesh was willing in those days, regarding the consumption of alcohol, even though the mind tried to dissuade us from being complete hooligans — a battle it often lost. Beer and whiskey were the preferred poison, and we freely enjoyed a few libations before kick-off, discussing various sporting talking points.
It was a measured build-up, if at times somewhat animated and passionate, as our conversation ebbed and flowed between various topics.
Little did we know what utter carnage awaited at least one of us as the London derby at Stamford Bridge kicked off.
Stu, an avid Gunners fan — the type who had the famous 1989 last-gasp, stoppage-time goal scored by Arsenal's Michael Thomas which secured a dramatic First Division championship, as a ringtone — was hopeful his side would pitch up manfully for legendary coach Arsène Wenger’s 1000th match in charge.
Chelsea, meanwhile, were in the midst of their heady days. Two seasons before, they had been crowned Uefa Champions League winners for the first time in their history, and followed it up during the next season by winning the Uefa Europa League title and FA Cup.
The Pensioners were building towards the 2014/15 campaign as they prepared to host their North London rivals, when they would win the Premier League-League Cup double. Jose Mourinho, the "Special One", still held power and influence in the hearts and minds of Blues supporters then, having engineered six of the eight domestic trophies he would win for the club.
Moreover, both teams were still in contention for the league title.
As the match started, there was a genuine tension and excitement regarding the outcome of the result. By the 20th minute, however, the outcome of the match was already decided and Stu was three shots in, while the Chelsea supporters had already doubled over in glee and laughter.
Goals from Samuel Eto'o in the fifth minute, André Schürrle in the seventh minute, and a penalty by Eden Hazard in the 17th minute had sealed the deal for Chelsea. A brace by Oscar followed, and then a sixth from Mohamed Salah in the 71st minute completed the humiliation.
It was wonderful stuff if you were on the right side of the record books, and not so great if you were staring down six drinks after a fairly innocuous bet.
So, it was with a severe degree of eye-rolling and gnashing of teeth that I watched Arsenal win the league this past week. I could probably have gone the rest of my life without seeing that side of the aisle win anything else ever again ... Sorry-not-sorry
The roles are now reversed. Arsenal, rather annoyingly, stand on the precipice of not only having won the league, but also sit a win away from holding aloft the Champions League, too, with the stability of Mike Arteta at the helm.
Meanwhile, the Blues have been flailing around since Todd Boehly’s BlueCo acquired the club, with at least five coaches in the dugout since 2022, with Xabi Alonso the next in line to take over.
Heavy-handed interference from executive management, questionable transfer strategies and acquisitions, and a total squad spend of over a billion pounds have created a frustrating run of results and fears regarding the future of the club.
This season, Chelsea can finish no higher than seventh in the league, to combine with recent finishes that include fourth, sixth, and 12th.
We had the 2014 result to hold over Arsenal supporters for well over a decade, but last season, when they pumped us 5-0, we lost that, too.
It has all combined into now having to grimace and endure Arsenal winning the title this year … Gross … Well, I suppose it could have been worse; we could be Tottenham right now.