London, England - Careering down a steep hill, I have all the co-ordination of a newborn deer. Wobbling wildly, my arms flapping in circles as I struggle to keep my balance, I look as if I’ve never used my limbs before.
I sway one way, then the other, hurtling forward before stopping dead and spinning in unsteady circles on the spot.
A crowd of confused onlookers is gathering to watch. Am I doing some sort of interpretive dance? Or perhaps I am recreating Usain Bolt’s infamous tumble with a cameraman on a Segway last week?
Well, not quite. The reason for my erratic movements is actually under my feet. I’m standing on a ’megaboard’, a two-wheeled, battery-powered scooter said to be the newest and trendiest mode of transport.
It’s also the latest celebrity obsession. Last month, singer Lily Allen was spotted zipping her way along the streets of Chelsea on one. Composed and relaxed, she positively glided through crowds, dodging shoppers before effortlessly hopping off.
Cheryl Fernandez-Versini, Nicole Scherzinger and Brooklyn Beckham have all tried it, too. Singer Sam Smith recently said he felt “all futuristic” about his new gadget.
To see if the board is suitable for normal people or just another A-list fad, I’ve borrowed one from WaHine, a Hertfordshire company and one of only a few in the UK to manufacture them.
At first glance, the megaboard looks a bit like a skateboard - but with a big rubber wheel at either end, rather than underneath. This means that instead of travelling sideways as with a skateboard, megaboarders face forward with the platform horizontal underfoot.
The board is plastic, with rubber pads. These are touch-sensitive and power the internal motor according to where the rider shifts their weight. This means the board can go forwards, backwards and round in circles. In theory, at least.
‘IT’S LIKE RIDING A BIKE’
As someone who’s never skateboarded or roller-bladed before, it looks utterly intimidating. But Ben Hiney, director of WaHine Boards, insists it’s easy to use.
“We have had some people get on it and pick it up straight away, while others need a bit more help,” he says. “But after 10 minutes, I promise you’ll be a pro. It’s like riding a bike - once you get used to it, it’s easy.”
The first thing to note about the board is its weight. At 10kg, it’s incredibly heavy and lugging it just five minutes to the park is exhausting. It also has a limited battery life - up to two hours, or 25 to 40 kilometres - and the 36-volt Samsung battery needs to be charged before use. I charge mine overnight to be sure.
At £400 (R8200) a board, this is no cheap gimmick - and fans can choose theirs in a range of colours, from go-faster green to gold, purple and red. I’ve gone for a sleek white number, hopeful that the muted design might help me blend into the crowd. I couldn’t have been more wrong.
Having read the 14-page manual - which has been translated (badly) from the Chinese and contains a few basic diagrams showing me how to stand on the thing - I’m ready to go.
COOL FACTOR
Hiney insists I don’t need a helmet or safety pads (“It takes away the cool factor,” he says, making me feel ever so uncool for asking), so I pop on a pair of flat shoes and set the board on the ground in front of me. I press the ‘ON’ button and green lights flash between the foot pads.
“When getting on for the first time, hold on to something like a door or wall,” advises Hiney. “You need to get both feet on as soon as possible.”
This is easier said than done. First, I’m in a park, where doors and walls are hard to come by. But also because as soon as I place one foot on the board, it judders and shoots forwards out of reach.
I perform this dance a few times before accosting a friendly passer-by and asking if I can lean on their shoulders to help me balance. First, I try jumping on to the board - but the pressure when I land on the rubber pads is too much, and it jolts forwards, sending me toppling.
A more successful approach is to stand on the centre, just off the edges of the pads, and inch each foot on to them at the same time.
Helpfully, the board emits a shrill beep when unbalanced, so I shimmy around a little - still holding the poor stranger’s shoulders - until it falls silent. Trembling, I let go. I push my toes down the tiniest amount and the board glides a few centimetres forward. Success!
I push down more and it does it again, this time faster. I’m gliding! I feel graceful, the very picture of finesse. And then I hit a bump - and promptly fall flat on my face.
ACHING CALVES
Capable of speeds up to 12km/h (equivalent to a fast jog) inventors say the megaboard is designed to be a viable mode of transport. You can’t use it on the road, but - like a scooter - it’s fine on pavements, and has powerful lights so it’s safe even at night.
It can carry 95kg and handle bumps, cracks and kerbs - as long as its rider can. The manufacturers advise against using it in wet weather, as the wheels may skid. Which is fine if you live in sunny Hollywood, less so for a rainy British summer.
Despite this, Hiney insists it’s incredibly popular and has fans of all ages.
“Anybody can use it,” he says. “We’ve seen children as young as five, and even a mother who was 56. It doesn’t matter if you’re old or young. A lot of customers use it to commute, too. It’s very convenient and makes walking seem so slow.”
What’s more, it seems to be good exercise.
“It’s really good for your balance,” he adds. “You’re working your core muscles and calves.”
Sure enough, my calves are aching after just 30 minutes - probably because I’m bent double, my whole body tense, rather than standing up straight as I’m supposed to. But it does feel like a workout. In the days afterwards, I’ll feel it in my abs and lower back.
After an uncertain start, I get the hang of the megaboard - as Hiney promised - within 10 minutes. Going backwards, turning corners and getting anywhere near the 12km/h maximum speed is completely beyond my capability, but I’m quite happy chugging along, attracting curious stares. What do spectators think of my whizzy new gizmo?
“It’s like something out of a sci-fi; you look like you’re on a hovercraft,” says one man.
“Doesn’t it go any faster?” goads another. A group of women have stopped to film my progress down the hill, capturing my shrieks and flailing dismount at the bottom.
“I’d certainly consider buying one - for my teenage son,” laughs one of them. “I’d just be worried he might sprain his ankle.”
A boy on a blue scooter is staring, eyes wide, at the contraption.
“Can I have one?” he whines, tugging on his mother’s sleeve. I’m tempted to hand mine over. Megaboarding isn’t something I’ll be repeating. I’m tense, sweating and still zooming around in spurts like a crazed Bambi.
The thought of riding the device to work, the shops or anywhere with cars and cyclists to navigate is truly terrifying. Both for me and them.
This is definitely one craze better left to celebrities with more money and time on their hands than sense.
Daily Mail