Johannesburg - Looking at the latest road casualties figures and bearing in mind that most victims are pedestrians, I think we need a Year of the Pedestrian before we run out of them.
Zebra crossings have come to mean nothing. No motorist respects them and, consequently, pedestrians have given up using them.
They cross anywhere nowadays and this, of course, makes motorists, especially taxi drivers, even more certain that pedestrians are challenging them for road space and, therefore, are fair game.
And the metro cops don’t care about pedestrians.
Personally, I always stop at a zebra crossing if I see someone is about to cross. I do it partly because the law says I must.
I suppose many will consider that a bit old-fashioned – a bit like adhering to that “love thy neighbour” stuff when all that it achieves is to drive your neighbours mad and, perhaps, seek interdicts.
The trouble is that whenever I stop at a pedestrian crossing, the pedestrians stop too.
They stand stock still. Then they slowly turn their heads and look at me like sheep on a country road.
Then their eyes begin to narrow.
They begin to ask themselves: “Why has this fellow stopped?” and: “What is this idiot going to do next?”
I wave them across with a wide, reassuring smile that I spread way behind my ears.
They do not move. I make sweeping movements of the arm. They stoop and, with lowered heads, try to peer at me through the windscreen while remaining rooted to the spot.
Then I give up and slap the car into gear and lurch forward – just as they decide to cross.
I brake hard. Everyone leaps backwards and freezes.
They now know the game is on.
Again I beckon.
But they are saying: “Oh no – you won’t catch us again.” They might start twitching but no one will move.
The cars behind are hooting. Finally I give up and dart forward just as they all make a break for it and run screaming across the street.
It would not surprise me if, one day, a traffic cop gives me a ticket for stopping at a zebra crossing.
Twenty years ago when traffic cops were described as “strategic executive officers of the Southern and Northern Metropolitan Substructures of the Transitional Metropolitan Council”, that worthy body decided to do something about pedestrians.
It issued bumper stickers reading: “Look out for pedestrians”.
It was left to the motorist to decide what to do once he or she spotted a pedestrian.
Motorists, of course, placed the stickers on the back of their cars as one does with bumper stickers, so pedestrians waiting to cross the road would be unaware of the driver’s empathy.
In view of all this, the Stoep Talk Organisation is considering reviving the PA – the Pedestrian Association.
The PA is the antagonist of the AA which, like the metro cops, doesn’t give a hoot for pedestrians.
And just as the AA helps motorists with their trips, so the PA helps pedestrians with their trips – such as when they trip on a loose pavement slab or over the reclining form of a road accident statistic.
The PA has a breakdown service. Pedestrians often suffer breakdowns. Breakdowns are most common in pedestrians who have been knocked down or mugged – or both.
Usually in that order.
Our breakdown service supplies monogrammed tissues to wipe away tears and tries to restore a pedestrian’s confidence in crossing the road again.
PA members are entitled to 20 percent off on splints and a little glass of something on admittance to casualty departments.
The Star