#SexColumn: Sexy staycation ideas to spice things up this festive season

Picture: Pexels/ Asad.

Picture: Pexels/ Asad.

Published Dec 9, 2022

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By Sharon Gordon

Johannesburg - If you’re not joining the migration to Plett or Umhlanga this year and can only afford a Staycation – Fear Not! We have some fantastic ideas to keep you relaxed, your relationship intimate and fun.

I don’t know about you but the best thing about a vacation is that it breaks the usual daily routines and suddenly you’re doing stuff slower and at different times. Taking time to smell the coffee so to speak.

Afternoon sex becomes an option as does a lazy lie in and eating strawberries in bed.

At the gym this morning we were talking about staying at home and the dangers. If you stay at home, work and chores will constantly be calling out unless you make an effort to change it up. Yes, dishes still have to be washed and beds made (well maybe not).

Try to break your daily home habits. Do NOT do anything on that list of chores – you’re on holiday remember.

Decide how long your staycation is going to be – I suggest no less than five days, 10 if you can and 21 if you are determined.

Start with the simple stuff – Move your bedroom to a different room and if you can’t, change the furniture around (just for the staycation). Spray your sheets with a linen spray – try coconut it will immediately take you into holiday space. I love that suntan smell.

Get out the candles – thanks to Eskom they are probably close at hand already. Get ones that smell delicious and burn them even if your inverter is working like a dream and you don’t have to consult the load shedding schedule.

If you are lucky enough to have a pool, get out the bright swimming towels, clean the cushions and move the outside furniture. If you usually go to the beach on holiday – go to the pool.

Apply sunscreen every day – nothing says holiday more than sunscreen. Better still get your partner to apply it for you. Touching and stroking is a great way to reconnect.

If you don’t have a pool, turn the sprayers on and run through them like you did when you were a kid or get water pistols and have a game of tag. If this is the adults only version, you can use tequila and make sure your aim is true.

Wear only the clothes you would on holiday, so get out the bikini, baggies, T-Shirts, sarongs, shorts and slip slops. Paint your toenails a holiday colour, try bright pink or my favourite bright ox blood red.

One of the things I love about going on holiday is the shops always look so different. Next, go shopping. You don’t have to buy anything. Go to Wimpy for breakfast.

Don’t go to your usual Mall – shake it up a bit and go to the opposite side of town. A trip into the City Centre will make you feel as if you have gone to some exotic country, just remember to lock your doors and maybe don’t carry cash.

Shop for a sexy snack, holiday T-Shirt, lubricant and a toy or two. At Lola Montez in Hyde Park, we’ve made sure we’ve stocked up on holiday fun. We’ve got inexpensive card games and challenges to take you out of your usual play routine. If you’re not able to pop in check out our offering online www.lolamontez.co.za and look for the Romantic, Foreplay or Bondage challenge kits.

Get a Henna Tattoo – not too much commitment but exciting I’m not sure who offers them but I’d try my local tattoo parlour.

Holiday sex is different as well.

So, if you usually get cozy in the morning, change it to a different time. Many women’s libido peaks at about three in the afternoon. Send the kids to the pool and you take an afternoon nap.

Learn a new sex technique, I’ve been watching some very interesting series on sex – I’m going to share the exciting bits with you next year.

Change your usual go to sex position. Introduce a toy into your play – start small, a Vibrating Cock Ring, an Egg or Bullet is ideal. Lola Montez has a Naughty Night Starter Kit which contains everything you’ll need for a naughty night.

Go for an evening walk – round the block, in the park or simply down the road. Hold hands, stop and kiss, talk about what you see, plan dinner.

Holiday food is usually simple and easy to prepare or take out. Do the same on your staycation. Find simple recipes on www.food.com . Cook together – sip on a glass of chilled wine, listen to music and turn off the television.

For entertainment – go to movies, eat popcorn and drink something green. Take a Red Bus City Tour or go for a drive. Don’t take your usual route – get out and explore.

Invite friends over for the afternoon, drink cocktails and party hard. Spend the next day in bed – naked, cuddle, explore, nap and eat ice cream, a fast food outlet makes the very best passion fruit, shortbread cheesecake McFlurry. Feed it to each other!

If you have children – play Marco Polo with them in the pool (it’s what they’ll remember most).

Play board games, charades and let them teach you how to play PlayStation.

Let each child pick an activity and a favourite meal. Do it – even if it means Jelly Tots for breakfast, you’re on holiday remember.

Go to a bookshop and leave notes of encouragement in your favourite books for future readers. Let the children browse in the children’s or craft section. Get ideas on what to do with the kids the next day.

If you live in Johannesburg visit Mushroom Park or the Botanical Gardens. Mushroom Park and the Botanical Gardens are beautiful spots for a picnic and a game of soccer or cricket. Lie on a blanket and look at the clouds. See shapes and tell stories.

Support your local businesses – they are also staying at home. Take food, clothes, toys, dog or cat food to your charity of choice. Donate to www.dignitydreams.co.za if you don’t have a preference.

Put up the biggest Christmas Tree you can. If you have decorations, use them, otherwise make them. Paper and popcorn chains work well as hollow out and painted eggs. Go online to get additional ideas try www.hobbycraft.co.uk or www.pinterest.com.

Spend a day making gifts for each other and cards for your neighbours.

Bake and decorate cupcakes or cookies. Eat them all in one sitting.

Lie on the grass and look at the stars. Try to spot the satellites, shooting stars and constellations, you can download an app to show you what to look for, try Constellation Star Viewer available from your Smartphone App store.

Try to be on your Staycation for as long as possible. Real Life and work will take over soon enough.

Try to have as much fun as possible, laugh – who knows this may just be the best vacation you’ve ever had.

To you and yours may the season be filled with joy and love. Try to take a break. I have a feeling that we are going to need all our strength for next year. I will be here to guide your relationship through the highs and lows. Just remember till then to Play together.