Durban – IN AN effort to get closure, families are turning to psychic mediums to connect with their loved ones who died alone in hospitals.
During the Covid-19 pandemic, families are not permitted to visit patients who tested positive for the virus, unless arrangements are made and facilitated by the hospital management. However, many families are communicating with patients via phone and video-calls. But the lack of a physical presence at a loved one’s bedside has left a void for both parties, more so at the time of a death.
A mother of two, from Chatsworth, who declined to be named, said her husband tested positive for the virus in December. He died later that month.
"He was in ICU because he had a lung infection and he could not breathe on his own. My husband was weak and he could not speak to us over the phone or text us. We relied on the doctor to update us on his progress."
The woman, 45, said she was permitted to see him on two occasions for about 10 minutes each time – once, a week after he was admitted, and again, two days before he died.
"On both occasions, he was awake but he did not have the strength to talk. I stood at his bedside and I prayed with him. Before I left, I told him that I loved him."
The hospital later told her that he had died.
"I felt empty. My life from that point felt like it was on fast-forward. We arranged the funeral, where the hearse drove past our home before going to the crematorium. We did a small prayer and it was over. Our children (aged 17 and 19) and I did not see his face for the last time. We felt a void, like things were unfinished."
In mid-January, she met a psychic for a crossing-over. This is where a medium connects with someone who has died by tapping into energy.
"I reached out because I wanted to know if he was okay, if his soul had found rest or peace, and if he had any last words for us. I wanted him to know that the kids and I loved and missed him. During the reading, he said he was at peace and that he loved us. I knew it was him because, through the medium, he referred to me by a pet name. He was the only person who called me that. My husband said he was sorry for leaving us."
She said they did not take any of his belongings for the medium to tap into that energy.
"We just told the medium his name and how he died. She focused her energy on connecting with him. It was emotional but it gave us some closure. Now families can view the bodies of their loved ones. Sadly, we were not so fortunate.”
Karishma Moodley, a psychic medium, said there was an increase in requests for crossing-overs.
"The initial requests were to connect with loved ones for comfort and guidance. But as the infection and death rate rose and more families were affected during the second wave, I received more requests from those whose loved ones have died abruptly.
"These families longed for peace and liberation for their relatives. They needed a sense of closure and comfort. They wanted to know if their loved ones were angry or upset with them.
“Also, many families are rooted in tradition and custom. Until recently, they were not permitted to see or conduct all the religious practices for those who died from the virus and this impacted the way these families mourned. Some of them struggled with depression and guilt."
Shirley Bramwell, a psychic, said families were desperate to find out if their spouses, children, parents and relatives were okay and whether they had suffered in their last moments.
"These families are also traumatised that their loved ones were taken to hospitals and they had to return home without them. What was even more painful and disheartening was that families were not able to have the bodies brought into their homes so they would have a private moment to mourn.
"Not being able to perform their last rites in the manner they are used to causes more trauma and suffering. These families are looking for some kind of comfort by way of connecting to their loved ones to find out if they are okay, and if they suffered. They want to find out how the crossing-over was? Who was there for them? Are they at peace? Some even want to apologise for not being there for them, or for the things they could not do for them, in terms of the last rites.”
She said families needed some form of inner peace.
"A crossing-over does give families a sense of inner peace and relief. Unfortunately, we all have to go through the pain of loss."
Dashina Kalicharan, a psychic medium, said: "Those suffering from Covid-19 believe they will recover and when they do die, the soul is in denial. What helps them find peace is the prayer and rituals after the funeral."
Kalicharan said when people died from an accident, or from a virus, like Covid-19, it took the soul a long time to find peace.
"Families are seeking closure because they never got to say goodbye. In normal circumstances, when a person falls ill, the family is at their bedside. This is not the case with Covid. Patients are dying alone in hospitals. They cannot see or spend time with their families. They don't get to have those last words and this leaves a void."
Kalicharan said even at the funerals, families did not get enough time to pay their final respects.
"They are left with a sense of emptiness. They, therefore, want to make sure that their loved one's soul has found rest or peace and that they have crossed over. They want to know about the deceased person's last wishes, while others just want to say 'I love you'."
Diva D'Andrea, a psychic, said prior to the government imposing the lockdown last March, she had many international clients whose families had already succumbed to the virus.
"This prepared me for what happened next. As soon as the government imposed level 5 of the lockdown, I was inundated with calls. At first, they were afraid that their families would test positive for the virus and they wanted predictions. But as the death toll rose, so did the demand for crossing-overs.
"This year, it is apparent that relatives were seeking closure. Many people sought to say goodbye but, as a result of sudden death, many need guidance on settling the deceased’s estate and family matters. The demand for crossing-over in South Africa is currently high."
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